letters to blind eyes #2

edit.

dear you,
i used to think you completed me,
you don't. but that's okay.
i love you with all my heart,
even when it's really hard.
sometimes it feels like you don't see that,
or you don't care. but i'm sure you do.
somewhere inside you,
you know. you care.
but just so you know?
sometimes it hurts to see you,
you are so heartbreakingly beautiful.

love, katie rose.

letters to blind eyes.

dear j,
"your faith walks on broken glass."
i used to know you so well,
looked up to you. still do i guess.
but it's not the same.
you've changed. i've changed.
you make me very sad sometimes.
how can you ever truly create,
if your soul is wasting away?

dear...,
sometimes i would like to break you,
tear you down. see if you like how that feels.
God knows you've done it to me enough.
but you always pull me back,
like moon pulls the tide in.
i hate how much you do this to me.
all i want is a breakaway at this point.

dear j,
there's too much to put here
in a little message box.
i still cant help missing you.
my heart keeps beating it out
in unsteady rhythms, until i'm dizzy.
stars hit my eyes,
skyline, meet optical nerve.

dear _,
you're not real to me yet,
but i'm hoping soon.
and if i know your name i'm sorry.
we'll work it out,
when you hold my hand,
and give me butterflies,
when our worlds collide.
that's when we'll figure it all out,
nostalgia or fresh beginnings.
could you please find me quickly?
i get so lonely.

dear k,
i know you can read this.
the other half of me.
you're all the things i hate,
resurfacing like fish in toxic water.
death and decay, that's what you are.
i no longer need you to be strong.
i am strong through someone else now.
He is bigger than you. better than you.
strength flows through his blood.
leave. you make me sick.

thank you.

dear x,
thank you for being the stars in the sky,
and all the pretty things that make me smile.

dear x,
thank you for being there, being square,
and for fracturing my heart in a dozen different places.

dear x,
thank you for giving me butterflies,
even if you took them away so harshly.

dear x,
thank you for the smiles and laughs,
that you hate and i love with all my little heart.

the tunnel.

made it's comeback. though i'm the only one who knows what that means.

thudthud.

"holding too tightly, afraid to lose control."

#2

i don't want to be a back up plan.

you.

yeah you.

i miss you.

love, your davey.

monotone.

sometimes i don't want to feel anymore.

but that would make me so boring.

overwhelmed.

that is me. just overwhelmed by everything. i cannot say the right things at the right time. i am only human, and i feel like people need me to be superhuman. i'm ridiculously imperfect. and i cannot be the friend you need me to be. and friendship means everything to me. everything. and security means the world to me. gain my trust and you've gained all of me. but now i'm just overwhelmed.

selfishness.

it's a disease. i suffer from it chronically.