thought of the day #15

i am getting very close to telling you just how i feel. to let you in on this huge, empty secret that's been bruising my heart. part of me knows it is very essential that i do this. the other part of me knows that it probably won't change anything. not a thing. and that is hard for me to grasp. it makes me wonder why we have emotions at all. why hurt exists. why someone always has to be ignored, and why someone always has to be honest. why do we feel? feeling is very hard. and i get caught up in it so much. i have probably over-exaggerated everything that's happened up until this point, but it's how i feel.

and even if nothing changes at all, i need you to know this.