shatterkid part two.

seeing as i am an emotional trainwreck at the moment, i probably shouldn't be writing this. but boundaries be damned, this is my blog. at the moment i'm not crying, which is actually surprising to me. today i cried in a starbucks. today i cried driving on imperial highway. i'm glad i'm not crying now because i feel like i could vomit. too much information? too bad. just got told to my face that i am doing everything wrong in a relationship and if i don't fix it, i will lose her. the inevitability of it all is driving me insane right now. i feel so unfairly judged and unjustly dealt with. i'm not used to being shoved into my own faults so carelessly by someone who promises that she loves me so much. if you really loved me so much you would handle me with care because i'm not invincible. i can and will break. i feel abused right now. even though i know she's right about how i'm acting. i haven't opened up to her. i haven't talked to her enough. i haven't been myself around her. she was honest with me, brutally so, and i appreciate it. but it still hurts and i still feel sick. and right now i don't want to talk to her anymore, because i feel a little bit like i'm shattering. so what do i do now?